The Anti-Betty Crocker
So, baking those cookies didn't quite turn out as expected. And this is entirely my fault. I know that. Never, ever take short-cuts when baking. They never work.
Because I didn't feel like having a bunch of flour and eggs and various other cookie ingredients laying around, taking up precious cabinet space for months on end, I decided to buy the pre-made drop cookie mix. What could be the harm? I could use the "1" cut-out and make a zillion and it would work out great, taste good, and save me loads of time.
Did you know that the drop cookie pre-made dough is super sticky and of a consistency that is not normal for most cookie doughs? Did you know that you can't use cookie cutters on this dough because it will just stick to the inside of the cutter and not even your pinky finger can get it out? Did you know that there is no curse word in existence that is utterly satisfying when you're this frustrated?
This is what the "1"s turned out looking like.
When I saw this first batch, I had a small meltdown. At around this same time, I got an email from my GBF asking about my baking experience. The meltdown got worse. Oh, the pressure! After some venting and what-not with the GBF, I had a creative stroke of genius and hurried to continue to the baking process.
So everything went round after the "1" fiasco, and I glitzed and glammed up the regular-looking cookies with home-made pink icing and sprinkles. So even though all the cookies were ugly naked, they were dolled up to perfection when decorated. Sort of like a drag queen.
The results:
All the kids liked them; many of the adults had more than two; Uncle Larry snuck more than 5. A true success!
Because I didn't feel like having a bunch of flour and eggs and various other cookie ingredients laying around, taking up precious cabinet space for months on end, I decided to buy the pre-made drop cookie mix. What could be the harm? I could use the "1" cut-out and make a zillion and it would work out great, taste good, and save me loads of time.
Did you know that the drop cookie pre-made dough is super sticky and of a consistency that is not normal for most cookie doughs? Did you know that you can't use cookie cutters on this dough because it will just stick to the inside of the cutter and not even your pinky finger can get it out? Did you know that there is no curse word in existence that is utterly satisfying when you're this frustrated?
This is what the "1"s turned out looking like.
When I saw this first batch, I had a small meltdown. At around this same time, I got an email from my GBF asking about my baking experience. The meltdown got worse. Oh, the pressure! After some venting and what-not with the GBF, I had a creative stroke of genius and hurried to continue to the baking process.
So everything went round after the "1" fiasco, and I glitzed and glammed up the regular-looking cookies with home-made pink icing and sprinkles. So even though all the cookies were ugly naked, they were dolled up to perfection when decorated. Sort of like a drag queen.
The results:
All the kids liked them; many of the adults had more than two; Uncle Larry snuck more than 5. A true success!
1 Comments:
That's freaking hysterical! I love to cook but a baker I am not, specifically for the reason you said: it's so precise. A tablespoon and a teaspoon can be the difference between perfection and a pile of slop. I'm glad you were able to pull it off somehow, and I'm sure that Diva Niece loved them anyway!
By
RockerMom, at 8:48 PM
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