Losing Control of My Inner Monologue

06 March 2006

Oscars Recap

The 78th Annual Academy Awards presented little controversy this year, which made for a slightly boring 3.5 hours. But all in all it was still good fun for us movie-philes and celeb watchers.

Just about everyone I wanted to win did. Dashing George, the ever-formidable P.S. Hoffman, America's sweetheart Reese, and even really-preggers Rachel. I like seeing my picks win. And not just because I feel like I chose well, but because they deserved it. Equally deserving but missing her nod was Felicity. TransAmerica was that good. If nothing else, this recognition will help her take that next leap in Hollywood.

It's fine by me that Brokeback won for best directing -- if only because I don't think anyone else stood a chance. The studios did a great job of positioning Ang as the winner in that category. And having just returned from Hong Kong, I appreciated his Chinese shout-out to the region. And it was equally fine that it won for best adapted screenplay, if only because Larry McMurtry snubbing his nose at the entire affair and wearing jeans was fun enough to see. Irreverant Jon Stewart got a good joke out of it, so it was worth it.

I'm not as thrilled by the winner of the best picture. Crash?!?! You must be kidding me. I rented that movie months ago and hated every minute of it. It takes every overdone cinematic element (a group of people intermingled in a day or two period of time and how they all interact and touch each other...Now we look at these snippets from everyone's different viewpoints...blah blah) and commingles them with every overdone issue (modern-day racism, hatred, etc.). Granted, it's an all-star cast. And it's nice to see Ryan Philippe is still acting and even nicer to see that Matt Dillon is aging really nicely. But even that didn't make those two hours remotely worthwhile or entertaining. I am not one to turn off a movie. I like to complete tasks, and this was one big chore I saw through to the end. And I was so irate that this highly-touted movie proved to be such a disappointment. I can never, ever get those hours of my life back. And here it goes and wins. Which means every other smart person who never saw it will now feel compelled to watch it, thereby losing two hours in their life. So cruel.

I like to see the underdog win, and I suppose Crash did just that. I mean, I didn't want to see Brokeback win. But I really didn't want to see Crash win, either. Why not split the difference and give it to Capote? Or Good Night and Good Luck? I like twists and turns and surprises and this category delivered that. But I feel like I hung in there for a whole lot of nothing. Now my expectations for next year are almost unattainably high.

Bring back Jon Stewart, let the jokes fly, and we're already off to a good start in '07.

Now that the Oscars are over, here are some good things that come out of it ending:
I'll be happy to never hear that awful Brokeback Mountain theme again (even though it did win -- which never would have been my choice)

Actually... That's about it. Times infinity. I hate that theme song with every fiber of my being.

Here is one really bad thing that may come out of it:
I may actually have to hear that stupid pimp song again. It really was awful.

And, because I was asked to do so and because it's fun, here is my personal best/worst dressed list. E! has nothing on me.

Best Dressed:
Felicity Huffman. Just stunning
Sandra Bullock. Lovely dress
Keira Knightly. Love the garnet color. And only she can pull off that cut.
Reese Witherspoon. She wears vintage well.

Worst Dressed:
Charlize Theron. Seriously, that bow was bigger than her head!
Michelle Williams. Awful dress. Awful color. Great make-up and hair, though.
Helena Bonham-Carter. She couldn't have done worse if she had rolled out of bed and picked through dirty laundry. Then again, look who she's married to. Maybe this is more a lifestyle choice than a fashion statement.

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